| (no subject) |
[Dec. 8th, 2005|01:38 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | project runway. | ] |
Id like to express my feelings in form of photography.
i got my wisdom teeth taken out last friday, and of course.. just like with electronics, anything that has to do with health, always goes bad for me. i have bad luck with both of those things. they took out all four so my cheeks were soooo huge.. the pain was so bad. and thennnnn.. i get a bad rash on my cheeks n my mouth is still number after like 3 days.. so i called the dr up n hes like oh ur allergic to penicillin so stop taking it.. and he said that the numbness shouldve gone away already. blah.. its been almost a week and my left side of my mouth and chin are still numb as fuck. im still drowsy and in semi pain and have a nasty rash on my cheeks.
so the picture is perfect to describe my feelings. thank you.
oh and i have like a million drawings to do and a pop art piece i have to finish still. and yeah.. im not in high school anymore... so missing 3 days was horrible. dammit! ya.end.
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 5th, 2005|02:08 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
ive been scared of death lately, a really good friend of mine died a week ago. we were together in drumline in the school band and i used to go over her house and we would always be practicing. she used to play the biggest bass drum, cuz she could. she didnt even know how to read music but she played the damn thing like there was no tomorrow. she was one of the nicest person i have ever met. before it happened i had talked on the phone with her, planning a drumline reunion, i wanted to see her. it sucks that i put off those plans for so long that now its too late. it just sucks so much, and ive been told to get over this already but i just cant. i KNOW shit happens but it scared me, that someone could just like that DIE. and she was so young, she didnt deserve it.
i keep thinking to myself, why didnt i hang out with her, why didnt i call her more? just like that... shes dead. shes no longer here. i went to her funeral and ive never been to one before. i didnt realize it would be that shocking. i couldnt sleep the night before and i was nervous the whole day, it was just so horrible seeing so much pain in ppl and seeing pictures of her and my old drumline buddies just crushed. i could see her face popping out of the casket, froma distance. i didnt wanna go in cuz someone had said it was for family only. but i could still see her, and her mom holding her head and kissing her. before they closed it i went in, cuz i was going to regret it if i didnt see her at least to say goodbye. so i did and i still cant get it out of my head. she looked so calm, so quiet, i thought it was a joke, i thought she was gonna wake up and say "jk" but its so hard to cope with the fact that its NOT like that. shes FOREVER gone. i cant cope with it i cant i dunno why. im so scared of driving fast, and im scared of dying. ive never been scared of that till now. i dont get it. when my grandfather died i didnt feel this way. i guess it was cuz he had cancer all over his body and was old and bound to die. i didnt even cry. this has been the only time its affected me and i think its cuz she was so young.
eventually ill accept it.. maybe shes somewhere better, away from all this bullshit. but what if shes not? who know? what if she just disappeared. that scares me. to know that we can just die and disappear. whats worse of all is she died coming home.. almost home.. lost control of the car and drove into one of the MILLION canals that are in miami. she tried to escape but she drowned. some say she mightve gotten hit, or maybe she was sleepy, i kno it wasnt cuz she was drunk or on something, that was proven. who knows. it gets me mad. and the worst part: her biggest fear was drowning.
ill end this super long entry i just had a lot on my mind
RIP Shayra |
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| fuck the big C |
[Jul. 27th, 2005|02:37 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  scared | ] |
life is so fucking unfair.
i dont believe in god but i do believe there is something somewhere, so i pray to life in general that everything will be better. give the whole family strength to fucking go through this again.. marine corps style, hopefully for the last time.
thank you bella bey for being here for me all the time. you are my angel. |
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| really quick |
[Jul. 19th, 2005|04:38 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
I just thought i should share with everyone that HOTEL RWANDA has GOT to be one of the BEST movies i have EVER seen.. its AMAZING. its emotionally disturbing.. i paused it and walked around like a million times. i wanted to stop the movie and just save everyone. its incredible, and sooooo fucking good. if you didnt feel like crying when you saw this movie then you are not human.
Its so amazing how theres so much HATE in the world.. wow. i wanted to go into the kitchen and slit my wrists. and omg. i felt like shit every two seconds. wow. i was fucking 2 inches away from the screen because of how into the movie i was...everyone HAS to see this movie.. i just thought i should share that ok. bye.
OH.. another movie that deserves me saying something about it is fucking RIZE UMM.... fucking amazing too. i wanna have sex with miss prissy. the way those people dance, and the reason why they do it and how they create like a whole sub-culture is fucking wow. my mouth didnt close at any time. i saw it a while ago but didnt think about writing it up in hurr until now. since miami is GAY and has no culture, it only lasted like half a week in the movies.. we had to drive like all the way to hialeah to watch it. fucking miami peace of shit. that shit doesnt happen in san fran. so anyways.. watch fuckin RIZE.. its beautiful. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 14th, 2005|03:40 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blah | ] |
i feel nauseous...
my feelings would be best expressed in form of photography..
bleh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 11th, 2005|03:43 am] |
i found this really cool dish network deal online. my dad took out directv cuz we were paying a shit load of money.. and now were paying for shitty comcast and i dont get my fucking showtime.. but this one looks cheap and i think were gonna get it you get like hbo AND showtime and its like 20 a month for like 4 rooms or some shit. just thought i should share it.
DISH NETWORK SHIT |
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| san fran love |
[Jul. 1st, 2005|02:53 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | rimbombante | ] |
ali got netflix so weve been watching a lot of movies.. ive seen most of the ones shes gotten but i did see the motorcycle diaries and lemony snickets w.e w.e. motorcycle diaries was ok.. really not that deep. you could tell it wasnt a mexican director cuz it really wasnt good at all. it dragged. and then lemony was super cute and tragic but i like it. jim carrey is so funny. i cant believe he did that stupid SUNSHINE movie.. UUUUUUGHHHHH.. it TRIED to be artsy but it just got too fucking stupid and meaningless. i hated every second of it. but of course its trendy to ike that movie. bleh.
so. i cant get enough of san fran. today i was remembering it a lot.. so i decided to post 3 random san fran pictures.
me n ali at the omg.. wuts it called.. the fucking flower place. so fucking pretty
admiring one of the best fucking artists ever.. Gottfried Helnwein. amazing detail and fucking beautiful subject matter. ay that sounded gay.. lemme rephrase.. he fucking paints so fucking pretty.. and i love what he decides to paint. his colored pencil pieces are my fave. it looks like im looking at the boys penis but im not.. hahahah.
an last but not least.. my brother with his measuring cup. he didnt have forks spoons, cups, tupperwear, nothing.. but he DID have a measuring cup. thanks.
ya! |
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| swim paddles |
[Jun. 30th, 2005|04:24 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  creative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | no | ] |
HI i just wanted to share with everyone where i will be working hopefully by the end of next yr. this is my dream job and i am working real hard rite now to make a good solid portfolio slash demo reel.. whatever it is that i need to do.
ladies and gentlemen
::drumroll::
the best place to work in the entire universe plus 7 number 9
::drumroll::
one of the reasons why im leaving shitty ass NO ART miami
::drumroll::
future character designer slash story artist slash w.e. i want
::drumroll::
faggot drumrolls..
PIXAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
just thought everyone should know. bueno off to do some frame work of some pieces ive finished recently. (ay pero i sound like such a little artist what a fag)
good nite!
p.s. what is UP with female body builders? theyre so gross!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 28th, 2005|03:27 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  exhausted | ] |
dedicated to all my past crushes.. inspired by the last post.
ay bueno its just 2
CHEF LACASTRE!!!!! while i was going to johnson and wales, he was my.. shit.. what class was it? um... OH YEAH. fundamentals of food service
he was british and had the most amazing accent.. and was OBSESSED with food temperature.. he would walk around with a laser thermometer and like ZAP your meat all the way from the other side of the kitchen and scream "WHY IS THAT CHICKEN AT 120!?!? WHY IS NO ONE KEEPING IT HEATED!!?" i love it.
and
MS. BELLA HEV!!! the cutest fucking teacher in the history of teachers.. my english teacher for my senior yr in high school.. she is just sooooo fuckin bella and i love her. greko can agree. we were always bothering her and we would always be around her desk.. she would get so annoyed but she secretly liked it i kno.
thats it.
oh.. and a random picture.
( Read more... ) |
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| ok then |
[Jun. 28th, 2005|02:24 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | RAINDROPS!! | ] |
im gonna be a good girl and update this more often.. hmmkay.
i have a confession.. i like someone. she works with ali.. DONT TELL HER. her name is veronica and shes mexican.. shes so hot and i want her. alicia vera.. if youre reading this.. PLEASE.. dont get mad.. its true.. i like her.
next time you work together.. tell that bitch that she better strip for me.. like i did for her.
dear veronica:
when and where?
love.
ur not so secret admirer,
regina
hahahhahaha.. i have so much fun with myself.. im so tired. all kidding aside i really do like her. :)
te amo ali!
p.s. its raining.. its nite time.. its PERFECT to go to sleep. |
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| yeah |
[Jun. 17th, 2005|02:59 am] |
GOSH! i havent updated in forever.. im so bad. w.e. ill make my come back with a FAGGOT survey.. i lovedededed them and when you have nothing to say.. these are the bomb.
( Read more... ) |
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| pinche suero |
[Feb. 24th, 2005|12:27 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
um..
im tired of being sick. where did it come from? what is this i fucking have?
i went to the doctor cuz i have diarreah, and a really nasty acid feeling in my stomach... NOOOOOOOOOO APPETITE.... which for me is a HUGE deal. cuz food is my life. but anything i put in my mouth i will gag.. its so hard to swallow. i also have this super tight feeling in my stomach... im nauseous most of the time.. dizzy and have no energy. this.. gets me very... very ... depressed.. i start to panic and just want to not do anything. im at home the whole time and when im alone i go crazy.. but when ppl are here i feel better.
i stopped going to work cuz of this and havent gone back.. there giving me two weeks off the schedule.. hopefully by the end of this time i will feel better.
anyways the doctor said i have mad acid in my stomach.. and its going up to my esphagus and all this shit that i couldnt really understand.. also that my hormones were fluctuated. so she gave me a mothafucking PAP SMEAR.. omg. it was the worst. it was so embarrasing but thank god ali was there. when i see her next time shell tell me if im able to take birth control.. cuz my periods.. DAMN. terrible.
she told me to take prevacid. multivitamins.. cranberry juice and protein shakes. i took a blood test yesterday and i dont get the results i think till next week. im probably fucking anemic. aaaaarrr... im so mad. i feel like ASSSSSS in the mornings.. AAAAAASSSSS... i gag every two seconds.. but then i take my medicine at like 2 and i feel better better at like 6.
im depressed. i need food.
if someone put a curse on me.. you hit the mothafucking spot. cuz this shit is the worst.
w.e. ive been watching a lot of tv.. PROJECT RUNWAY finale was today.. OMG.. the best.. im so happy my fave won.. JAY! hes so funny... talented.. and just an awesome person. im glad wendy lost.. shes a cunt bag. and kara saun fucked herself over with the shoe thing. but wow. this is the best show in the world. fucking telented motherfuckers.
thats it. no more
p.s. DEAR KAMEL.. you kno what my mom is making me take? fucking SUERO! remember that nasty shit.. when we would throw up they would give us that so we woudltn dehydrate.? tasted like ass.. its called... um... some shit in english. w.e. its gross. |
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| chisme |
[Jan. 28th, 2005|01:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | aretha franklin - im in love | ] |
so like my job is getting super gay. one of my shift supervisors.. one of my favorites... got fired on monday for supposedly making racist jokes. mind you hes black. and him and me used to joke around calling each other "ODESSA" and "JOHNSON" and we used to ring this huge bell that we have in the back room, that our manager used when he dressed up as santa.. and we would call it our slave bell.. HAHAHAH and he would tell me to wash dishes cuz i was the fucking mexican.. and i would tell him to stay in the back cuz he was black.. hahahahah.. and it was funny. WELL. one of our co-workers.. a WHITE LESBIAN girl.. got offended.. and decided to tell on us.. and well yeah he got fired. i didnt. so.. ppl are shady now. and this other lesbian i work with.. gets offended when i say "faggot shit" or "gay" or even "UGLY"... what ISSUES she has.. i dont know.. but its annoying to change just for sensitive ppl. but what the fuck is up with that.. im like "im a fucking lesbian too"
i dont get offended when ppl say that shit.. only if they say it in a bad way.. like OH U FUCKING DYKE! then ill be like.... WAIT A MINUTE. HOLD UP. but like "gay" and all that faggot shit.. come on.. GET OVER IT!. maybe this girl had a bad time like coming out of has issues with it but damn.. so did i.. EVERY homosexual goes through that... but you should come out with a hard skin... not fucking soft offended shit. it should make you stronger not weaker.. i kno i got stronger. i wish i could help out everyone that has gay issues cuz i know its terrible.. but this girl is like 27.. YA.. get over it. ITS GAY!
whatever.. yesterday i went to barnes and noble to find some books and tell me why... shit is like in ALL the wrong places.. and i know why its like that.. cuz ppl are too FUCKING LAZY to put shit back where they got it from! mother fuckers!!! i had fucking sex books in like the art section and it was sooo annoying. i would hate to work there. i mean... its fucking annoying to put up wth ppls caffeine addiction and making a MILLION fappuccinos.. but damn.. these fucking barnes and noble ppl are hardcore. if you go to barnes and noble.. DONT hog up the chairs.. and PUT YOUR SHIT BACK! fuck. it gets me mad. and if you work there.. fucking... i respect you. and im sorry.
so its me and alis one yr 11 months today.. almost two years.. WOOO. im so ex.. im so in love its so good.. me and ali have gone through some bad and good shit and im so glad weve gone through it. and just to look back and see how shit was with my parents and her parents and even me not being comfortable showing public displays of affection before... and how everything is now.. wow! its incredible.. weve grown and its the best.. I LOVE YOU!
bye! |
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| CHANTICO! CHANTICO WHERE YOU AT? |
[Jan. 2nd, 2005|12:18 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | ray charles - sinners prayer | ] |
wow i just had these orgasmic jelly beans... they have like a little map in the back with pictures that lets you identify what jelly bean has what flavor. they have like butter popcorn... coffee... cinnamon buns.. omg.. i was like OMG!.. its a.d.d AND yummy at the same time. oh and its not jelly belly.. i hate those fuckers.
anyways thats not the point of this post... i just got off work and wow.. some customers are so annoying.
i wanted to make a quick update and let a bitch know what my faggot new years RESOLUTIONS are.
1. Let go of my anger and resentments... im an angry creature and im pretty sure it has to do with this stupid city. i also have a lot of resentments towards my grandma and other members in the family for a LOT of reasons. BUT.. im letting go of everything... anything negative in my life will just be ignored. my anger towards customers, cubans, the weather and anything else.. will be gone. ive been reading about anger and hot to let go of it and im really working on it.
2. GO TO THE FUCKING GYM!.. well... first i have to make sure with my doctor im allowed to gym shit.. cuz of my back. but if i can then i will be there.
3. Be true to my veganism.. i slip so bad with starbucks pastries. ill only eat them when i have to try coffee or some shit. OH WAIT.. period doesnt count. :)
4. reach 2500 dollars saved up.. to get the fuck out of here n go to san fran.. (halfway there!)
5. oh n stop biting my lips.. hard one.
thats all i can think of for now...
n we move on to what i got for xmas.
( Read more... ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 28th, 2004|11:09 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | my brother on the phone | ] |
dear livejournal,
im sitting here on the computer while ali is drawing for her drawing class. she is the BEST drawer ever. her techniques are the best. i wish i was an artist like her. but anyways, today is my one year 7 months and i love ali forever!!!! she is my princess cuppy chicken bella!
the end |
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| AH PERO PERO MIRA! |
[Aug. 19th, 2004|03:05 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bitchy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | silence of the lambs | ] |
hi! omg i am officially THE WORST person to update journals.. im so laze..but im BACK for real now..
watch me not update until like december.. NO.. for real.. i have to document my trip with ali to san francisco.
first of all lemme begin with a rant. i shall call it.
MIAMI = PINK VOMIT.
our trip to san francisco to visit my brother was prolly one of the FUNNEST trips i have ever had in my life.. it opened my eyes to many things.
my brother is officially the bomb... hes such an amazing photographer and an AWESOME salesman.. he can talk a butch dyke into wearing a dress... hes amazing amazing amazing.. and i miss him soooo much. were soooo alike. thank u.
san francisco is DEFINATELY the best place to live ever...
-its so calm and so nice.. no one is rude like the majority of ppl here..
-u walk and go out and meet ppl.. without having ur underwear stick to your ass from the nasty heat.. like here.
-u can walk a couple of blocks and find little stores and markets and little bookshops or flower places... u dont have to get into ur car and DRIVE for 28937923793 miles in the nasty traffic only to get to a store full of ppl with attitudes.
Miami.. is soooooo GROSS!
-u have ghetto guys EVERYWHERE... being stupid.. "HOLLERING" at you like ANIMALS.. listening to their STUPID music..
-u have the ugliest, fattest and RUDEST ppl here.. all hispanics that dont speak any english and give u attitude for everything all chancleteando all over the place with their UGLY FAT faces.
-the weather is the most disgusting thing in the world... it DRAINS ur energy and u sweat all over the place... its so HUMID and WET and nasty.
-EVERYWHERE u wanna go u HAVE to drive.. u CANT walk ANYWHERE cuz.. 1. the fucking nasty heat and 2. its a fucking little town SOOOO SPREAD ... everything is so far... IMPOSSIBLE to get anywhere without a car.
-u cant even enjoy the beach at night anymore without being harassed or looked at by at LEAST 2 ghetto guys.
in conclusion.. miami is gross.. for IGNORANT and STUPID ppl.. im fucking leaving as soon as i can.
and now... hahahahhaha.. the pictures..
DAY ONE
( Read more... ) |
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| pero |
[Jul. 10th, 2004|04:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | teenage mutant ninja turtles in the background. | ] |
OSEA... after 98237927893872938792837 years of me not updating.. im here.. FINALLY.. its cuz..
my COMP BRRRRRRRRRRROKE.
the operating system got super fucked up.. and i never had time to take it cuz of work and stuff like that.
my fam from mexico came over.. like 99% of it.. so it was a mexican concentration camp in my house.. super funny.
i moved in with grek and yeah.. that way i didnt have to deal with it.
so yeah i took pictures.. i think.. so ill post those later. i have nothing to say now except im tired and now im like addicted to coffee.. which is bad for me being the eating healthy freak that i am.
today i worked from 530am to 12 and in the morning it smelled like burnt cooch... there was a fire last nite and OOOOOH GROSS.. it smelled so bad.
ive spent so much money on toys and i ran out of space to put them on display.
anyways that was random.. bye. |
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| hidden place |
[May. 28th, 2004|01:10 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | creative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | bjork - cocoon | ] |
so whats up with hamsters? ive been asking myself that question ALL day..
are they domesticated animals? grek said yes BUT.. were they always domesticated? did they used to RUN in the WILD? or were they always in little cages with spinning wheels.
u kno i get mad when i see fishes in tanks or birds in cages.. but i have mixed emotions with hamsters.. i dunno what to feel for them.. i dont even wanna go near them cuz ill feel akward..
"im sorry hams... i dunno what to say.. DONT JUDGE ME!"
anywho.. like my brother says..
the fucking gas is super fucking high.. its not even funny.. i used to be able to fill my tank with 22 dullars.. and now 20 filled it HALFWAY.. thats so bad.
i think ppl will wont vote for bush JUST BECAUSE of that reason.. they wont even care why its high theyll just vote for kerry.. cuz the gas with bush is so stupid.. i feel like i wanna walk or ride a bike.. con su pinche gasolina.. 92837927938 dullars to fill it up.
even if these ppl dont vote for bush out of ignorance.. its OK.. at least they wont vote for this stupido.
DEAR MR. PRESIDENT.. this is all i have to say to u.
relax.. step down.. have a cheto.
 . |
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| silehue |
[May. 25th, 2004|11:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | good | ] |
| [ | music |
| | listen - toad the wet sprocket | ] |
ay.. im the worst at updatin.. i decided.. i am so determined at first and then its like ... mmmm... no.
and i guess its als cuz i didnt have any pictures.. but now i do so i guess ill post some shit.
first of all lemme congratulate my beautiful ali sunsh rich bey.. for getting a job finally.. at a starbucks in the falls.. im so proud of u ali! u handled ur shit today.. and even if u might not be able to work after this.. ur still da bomb.
I LOVE YOU!
.. last friday we went clubbin.. and it was ok.. not that great but ok.. usually that place is way better but this time the music wasnt that good.. but oh well i had fun.
gina ali and me... and alis ghetto purse.
( Read more... ) |
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| low FAGGOT.!!!!! |
[May. 6th, 2004|02:24 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | dj rap - even when it rains (now THIS is nice music) | ] |
i swear TO GOD.. if i hear the words LOW CARB or CALORIES one more time.. i will punch a hole thru my wall..
ok fine.. no i wont. but ew.. im so fucking annoyed by this fucking new "trend"
stupid uneducated ppl that just follow what the popular crowd says.. "carbs make you fat" "i should count my calories" "pasta is so fattening" HAHAHAHAHHAHA stupidos!.
i wanna share a bit of information... rite quick.
DIETS are BULLSHIT.. they DONT work..
they make ppl deprive themselves for days to lose like point two pounds only to gain them back in like a week.
thats why you see ppl changing their diets all the time.. first "the zone" then "atkins" and now the faggot "south beach".. they keep changing and changing.. why? UMMM.. cuz NONE of them work.
when ur on a diet.. all u think about is the delicious food ur gonna eat after u finish ur diet.. cuz u deprive urself for so long that at the end ur gonna binge.. meaning.. ur gonna get FAT again. depravation and binging.. depravation and binging.. thats how the cycle goes.
i read in a book that said 62 percent of all americans are overweight, and more than half the nation is dieting or has dieted... how many diets have there been in the last 20 50 or 100 years? like 2893792739729387 so if diets worked dont u think that the rate of obesity would lower instead of increase?
FAT and STUPID ppl.. some dr tells u to eat MORE PROTEIN than carbs.. another one will tell you.. NO PROTEIN. more carbs.. another idiot will tell u ONLY grapefruit and eggs.. or COUNT UR CALORIES.. or lets be smart and take magical POWDERS and SUPPLEMENTS.. thats why ppl arent in shape.. theyre confused. and i feel bad for them.
its just about using ur mothafucking common sense.. if its not natural.. then its not sposed to go in ur body.. DUH.
out of ALL the mammals in the world.. which one is the ONLY one.. that has.. heart disease.. cancer... strokes? US!.. u will never see a monkey with glasses.. or a FAT tiger. why? cuz were the ONLY idiots.
we are the only ones that eat EVERY single food group in a SINGLE meal.. we are the ONLY ones that drink milk from ANOTHER mammal.. we are the only ones that eat another mammals MEAT.
thats so fucking gross!.. u dont see goats drinking out of an elephants titties.. or bears eating wolves. were not meant to do that nasty shit.. if we were.. thenwe would have sharp teeth for tearing meat instead of molars for grinding beans.. or we would have claws and paws to tear at meat.. not hands and fingers to pick fruit and grain.
usually i wouldnt write about this.. but this fucking low carb shit is pissing me off.. and the day im a nutrition teacher and write my nutrition book. i will be happy.
ill write about what happens in ur stomach when u eat meat... tomorrow. :) |
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chunkybrewster's journal